hashtag 30 by 30.

so i was walking home from a workout class last week and managed to get caught up in thinking about my mortality. totally normal, right?

i guess it's started this summer. i started realizing how much faster time has started to go by (minus winter) and it kind of freaked me out. because let's be honest, this is really how i've really been prepping for 30:

so, i did some math and realized that i have just about 35 weeks until i hit the big three-o. i then did the incredibly trite thing of making a list of 30 things/activities i want to do to make the most of the last 6+ months of my twenties. my hashtag 30x30.

thus i am sharing the list below with a complimentary gif to add a little zest to your day. 

1. lose 30 pounds

2. learn 30 new gluten-free recipes 

3. workout at least 3 times a week every week until my next birthday

4. try a different kind of workout at least once a month

5. get back online dating and actually try (calm yourself, mother).

6. make a video of the nyc highlights for my grandpa who has never visited here.

7. visit new nyc neighborhoods that I never venture to

but probably not brooklyn.

8. re-read catcher in the rye

9. learn to do at least 5 real push-ups

10. take a random personal day to just do something that makes me happy

11. write real mail to relatives/friends that will appreciate it.

12. actually hang up artwork i own and make my apartment look more grownup

13. try and enjoy downward dog position.

14. save an extra $30 a month to use to splurge on my bday

15. complete a 30 day squat challenge

16. take a cooking/wine tasting/pairing course just for the fun of it

17. do a random act of kindness when people really need it

18. be irresponsible on a school night and enjoy every minute of it.

19. try surfing because it looks cool (spoiler alert - already doing this on saturday!)

20. give away/toss at least 30 items of clothing

21. spend at least an hour a week cleaning/decluttering my apartment

22. treat myself to a spa treatment just because

23. find a signature cocktail

24. spend way too much money on a cocktail just for the view

25. learn how to cook with dates (the fruit, not men, mother)

not going to lie, my fave gif so far.

26. see all the oscar nominated movies for 2015

27. watch the wire and see if it lives up to the hype

if only i knew what this meant.

28. learn how to put on liquid liner

29. get a tarot card/palm reading

30. blog about my adventures

not quite, other queen b. not quite.

i feel like i have a good balance of measurable general life improvements with some frivolous fun that should make the next 7 months one hell of a ride. i can't wait to tell you all about it.

it's time to call it quits

no, no no, i'm not quitting my intermittent blogging. don't you worry your pretty little face over that. i will continue to randomly update you on my quest to be a better betsy for a while to come.

what i AM quitting is my monthly membership at the gym. in fact, i already did. today. not that they made it easy.

now, i'm sure you're all thinking, "wait, i thought half of the point of this was for her to get fit and rock at life." which is fairly accurate. it's also accurate to say that the other half of the blog is dedicated to photos of buddy. 

hello, handsome

back to the larger issue at hand: quitting the gym, yet still being focused on a healthier life. it's actually not going to be that big of a change for me.

i've been consistently working out for the past few months - spare my birthweek - but i've probably only stepped foot in my gym about twice. i've noticed that i really enjoy classes that aren't offered at my gym and have started going to them at least once a week. on top of that, the weather is finally changing around, allowing me to spend time outdoors to make the most of it, including in active ways.

dancing is a workout too, guys.

yes, specialty classes are expensive. but the workouts are better than any class i've ever been to at my "regular gym." so my theory was, i'm already paying for these extra classes, might as well take the money i'm spending on a membership i rarely use and put it towards those classes. plus, i get about a million daily deals emails, and there's usually some sort of package of workout classes available at a discount, so i can expand my horizons while getting an awesome workout.

the biggest takeaway i have from this hellacious winter (and spring, given that it SNOWED last night) is that i truly enjoy being outdoors when i can. not only do i live within walking distance to central park - the premier outdoor workout landscape - but i also live along a beautiful outdoor walking/running/fitness path that i have not taken nearly enough advantage of over the past few years.

taken on a commute home on a spring day. hashtag gorgeous

i own simple things like a yoga mat, hand weights, a jump rope and a resistance band, so i could take the things i've learned in these crazy classes and do them outside. and get my vitamin d requirement, which is especially important since i found out i'm severely deficient in it. (too much sunscreen and zero red meat will do that to a girl).

so bring on the bad tan lines and the neon workout clothes to blend in at these special gyms. needless to say, it's not me, large gym system in nyc, it's you. and we're never, ever, ever, getting back together.*

*well, maybe we will when it gets cold again. taylor's always wrong about everything.

rule #76: no excuses. play like a champion.

i read something this weekend and it's helping me start a new mantra for the next few months, so obviously, it's going to start with me telling you all about it.

it all began when i signed up for this thing called the listserve just over a year ago. do you know what the listserve is? basically it's a massive email database where a random lottery picks a reader to write a message to more than 23,000 people across the globe. here, watch a short video:

i like the idea of being able to read random people's thoughts, so naturally i signed up. plus, i'm just narcissistic enough to want to get picked and impart my wisdom (or more likely, list of favorite backstreet boys songs) with the world.

every day i get a notice in my inbox - actually into a custom folder that screens it because gmail is awesome - and i see what advice, stories, poems, recipes or thoughts people have to share. and then even better part is that there are no web links allowed, so no one is pimping their products.

yesterday, i logged on to read the past few days worth and one actually had something more than "live moment to the fullest" crap that i see somewhat often. the message was from samantha in wisconsin and it was simple: no regrets.

wedding crashers: always ahead of the curve.

as i was reading through it, i realized i make excuses CONSTANTLY. whether it's why i'm late for work (overslept/commuting issues/general laziness) to the reasons i don't make my nightly workout (happy hour/exhaustion/general laziness) to the reasons why i order in chinese takeout once a week (no food in the house/exhaustion/general laziness). do you sense a theme here?

so i decided that for the next month - and longer since i will no longer going to have a reason not to - i'm going to live with no excuses. no more finding inane reasons to do things that i just may not "feel like" doing. so that means tomorrow i will be eating most of my meals at home and definitely making that 6:30pm hot yoga class, despite the fact that it's a billion degrees outside and napping is the best thing in the world.

this also means that i have no excuses not to say yes to go out drinking on a wednesday if i don't already have scheduled plans. unless it's in brooklyn, because there is no excuse for going there.

straight up blogging #shame

yeah, so this wasn't exactly what i would call a banner week in the betsy blogging experiment. not only have i not blogged since last monday, but i did three things i am not proud of.

1. i missed my first sunday showdown
2. it didn't matter, because i barely met any goals.
3. i bought soy cheese

personally, i find the third the most offensive in the scheme of betsy-verse (my universe, duh), but the rest ain't to great either, yo.

and you know what, i don't even have a good excuse. and as much as i'd like to enact my 2013 motto of "sorry i'm not sorry," i actually am sorry. i took on this project to actively make a change in my life and i'm letting myself down. in more ways that one. 

don't get me wrong, i love myself. possibly a little too much if you ask some people. but whatever. for the most part, i am great. however, it's been a rough month for a few reasons that i will choose not to share with you here. just know that unlike momma rose, not everything is coming up betsy right now. which is okay. that's how you evolve as a person, or whatever.

the problem is that i happen to lack this thing called "patience."so i want things to change immediately, which is not realistic or feasible right now. and instead of continuing to believe in the system and continuing to take the steps to make changes, i'm letting it get me down. and frankly, it's not okay. 

now don't get me wrong, i don't have the blues and definitely not the reds (breakfast at tiffany's shout out!). i'm just not as new-puppy-first-day-home-with-a-family as i have been before. 

i mean, this is what i did last week, so things aren't all that bad:

snuggling with buddy, the destruction cat. new talent? he can open my medicine cabinet.

sangria. drink of the gods.

this city, man.

a beautiful show that i got to see with a beautiful friend of mine - hi pats!

iconic.

so, now that you can clearly see that i am not on the ledge, i'm going to take this week and focus on an extremely easy task: drink more water.

now, most of you are probably thinking, umm, b you are practically a fish because of how much water you drink. and that used to be true, but in the past week or two, i've been substituting wine for water. while delicious, it's probably not the best for my liver, kidneys or waistline. so the goal this week is to simply drink at least 4 containers of my brand new, lime green nalgene every day. including weekends, where typically the wine swap happens. 

don't get me wrong, there will still be wine. there will ALWAYS be wine. but this week, there will simply be more water.

let's see if when i pee excessively (not TMI guys. it's a truth) this week if i can also flush out all the other toxins that  i'm letting seep into my optimism so i can get back to myself.

shit, that actually sounded deep. +1 for this week already.

bad medicine is NOT what i need

this no dairy thing has been a lot harder than i originally thought it was going to be. and not just because i always want to eat pizza and ice cream.

it's been hard because i've been dealing with a constant state of nausea for the past few days and the only thing that remotely sounds appealing is a grilled cheese. 

and before you all start wondering if i'm pregnant, i'm not. (don't worry mom!). it's rather a super-fun side effect to the antibiotic i'm taking as a precaution to go along with my stitches. 

i've never had any of those potential side effects before from any medication (and let's keep it that way, shall we inner self?), so this one caught me off guard. in addition to making all food sound disgusting, it gives me a metallic "mouthfeel" (real word used in food marketing. thanks salt sugar fat!) that makes my mouth taste like i just licked the outside of a beer can for hours. not the inside where the goodness is. the OUTSIDE. so yeah, it's gross.

i've subsisted on gatorade, seltzer, plain turkey burgers and potatoes (mashed or french-fried) for the past two days, despite the fact that a grilled cheese has always been a comfort/sick food of mine. because it's fucking delicious yet quite mild mannered on the stomach. the ultimate win-win in my opinion.

yet, i've resisted. chalk that shit up to personal growth, ya'll.

now excuse me while i go chug a bottle of pepto.

sunday showdown: apparently not aging so gracefully

this hurts me to say, but i'm getting old. and sadly, i have some hard truths that back this up.

first and foremost, last week's self-imposed bed time was pretty great. i didnt' always fall asleep right at 10:30, but just having a reason to curl up with my cat (yep, going to be single forever) and settle in to sleep has been great. i also have a DVR for a reason. the TV will still be there for me in the morning, and just because i can't live tweet doesn't mean that i'm losing anything. 

safe to say, this is going to continue to be something i aim for weekly, though i will probably continue to stay up late for scandal, because shonda rhimes is KILLING it right now guys. seven fifty-two, indeed.

so now that we know that last week's "lesson" was a success, let me fill you in on the other few notes of my obvious elderly state. 

i spent friday night enjoying the beautiful spring weather and having a lot a few beers with co-workers on a rooftop deck, despite the fact that i knew very well that i had to be up at 6am to head up to the bronx for a full day of volleyball. i had set a firm deadline of 11pm for me to head home from a birthday party and get to sleep. 

naturally, this means i stayed out until past midnight dancing and drinking with some truly awesome people. naturally. 

luckily, i managed to invest in a couple slices of delicious pizza on my way home  to try and stave off any hangover in the morning. buddy helped me eat the crust in bed (i know i'm not supposed to give him people food, mom, but he wouldn't take no for an answer!) unfortunately, the tasty slices did not help me sleep safe and sound.

6am came bright and early. like real early, guys. i managed to scrape together my knee pads, high socks and shoes, threw on my spandex (oh yeah, super sexy) and sweats and headed to duane reade to buy all the gatorade and most of the food to stock up for the day. then i took the 6 train almost to its end. for real, 21 stops and it went above ground. i was unaware that the 6 train wet above ground, so it was definitely a surprise for someone (i.e. me) who was not in the mood to deal with sunlight.

i ate my (two) bagels and tried to buck up for my team. it seemed to be that after the first game, my dehydration from the drinking and massive sweating, which i am wont to do, made me drunk again. if that's possible. it sure as hell felt that way, at least. so needless to say, i felt great. 

until i saw that three of the teams in the tournament were college club teams. and they were so young. like, so young. i consider myself a young person and like to think that i could still pass for an undergrad student. well, i used to at least. because i literally looked across the net at one point and couldn't distinguish the setter (something you do in competitive vball. look, you learned something today!) from anyone else. they were literally all 18, blonde and tall-ish in identical uniforms. the spandex i was wearing were from my senior year of high school, so basically almost as old as they were. that was an ego blow.

the tournament itself went pretty well, we came in second place and i got some sweet new sweat pants as a reward. but we did play 7 games in the span of about 7 hours. and not to brag, but i'm pretty good at the game (i've been playing for more than half my life, so i should be by this point), which meant that there was no time of me sitting on the bench. i'm also extremely aggressive - shocker - and have no qualms about throwing my body across the floor in the chance to try and keep the ball up. and for some reason, my body doesn't heal quite as fast as it used to.

in the past, i would've been able to go out drinking after a day of playing. hell, i literally did that in college, and pretty damn well at that. but between the friday drinking and the saturday sports, i was one tired bitch. i fell asleep on the couch before smash could even come on at 8pm. and lord knows there is nothing i love more than a good hate-watching and live-tweeting of smash. buddy woke me up before 10 and was disappointed that instead of playing with him for a while, i just moved locations and slept hard for another 11 hours. 

he was also disappointed that it took me 20 minutes to get out of bed this morning because EVERYTHING HURTS AND I WANTED TO DIE. shoulders, back, ass, legs, feet, knees and neck were all screaming when i even considered moving them. this is not how it used to be. why is this happening? i just want to play sports and drink beers and feel nothing. why am i not still 22?

okay, rant over. because let's be honest, the insecurity of 22 is not something that i wish for ever again. neither is the pay grade, amiright?

you know what is great about being 28? taking newsworthy stories and making them applicable for real life. case in point? while sitting in the park today with my besties, most of whom are single like me, we were discussing flirting. my friend (shall remain nameless for this one) mentioned that she's finally getting the hang of flirting. extremely outgoing and will talk to everyone, she mentions how she needs to start with the light arm touch and the laugh. i, being the asshole that i am, tell her that she needs to lean in. and not sheryl sandberg style figuratively, but LITERALLY lean into a man when speaking with him. that way he can look down your shirt and tell you are interested (hi mom!). yeah, i'm making some real good choices and giving great advice to people.

the other great thing about being 28? being able to spring for the 10 minute massage at the end of your mani/pedi. because damn, it hurt so good today guys.

it's the perfect date, guys!

well, it's everyone's favorite day of the year, april 25th!

that being said, i figured a little midweek check in couldn't hurt.

i'm digging this going to bed early thing for the most part. but it's not making getting up early in the morning as easy as i hoped it would. in fact, those two morning workouts i mentioned trying this week? slept right through them. and it was glorious. friggin glorious.

i did manage to make my volleyball game last night and i am playing in another tournament on saturday, so i feel slightly better about myself. even if i missed out on some trudog time this morning. 

alright kids, short and sweet today because i really need to celebrate the perfect date accordingly.

which obvi means, i'll be wearing a light jacket and acting like the female rain man. duh.

manic monday: sleepyhead

ahhh chub rub. welcome back to my thighs. while i was ready for amendment 2b weather (the right to bare legs), i was not ready to see you again. 

but i digress.

this week's manic monday came to me in a dream. well, not really, but kind of.

this may come as a surprise to you, but i put relatively zero forethought into what i'm going to work on each week. i basically think about it all day sunday and try to figure out what i think is the least taxing and the most feasible for me to actually accomplish. then i go to bed and forget everything and make a decision on my commute to work.

to which i arrived on time today.

anyway, i played in a volleyball tournament all day yesterday, as i am wont to do, and was exhausted so once game of thrones was over (this episode lives up  to the crazy of a storm of swords. everything happens in that book guys. EVERYTHING), i skipped watching mad men live (second week in a row. oh well) and crawled into bed around 10:15. i put the TV timer on and barely heard it before heading off into oblivion. 



listen to this mashup. it's magic. even for sleepyheads like me.

i was so tired last night, i don't even think that my snuggle buddy buddy woke me up. which is basically the first time that's happened since i brought him home. i woke up happy and refreshed and ready to start the week. well, as much as i can be before coffee on a monday fucking morning.

so thus, i have decided that this week that i'm going to make a conscious effort to get to bed at an earlier time on school nights. in fact, i need to be in bed by 10:30pm. i don't necessarily need to fall asleep at that time, but personal electronics and lights need to be turned off. 

this may not seem hard to most of you, but it is for me. scandal is all new this week and i NEEDS to know what's going on with olivia pope and co this week, y'all. 

sunday showdown: one step forward, 2 steps back.

good news: i managed to arrive to work on time almost every day last week. the exception i already told you about. so this week, a success.

however, my life was a crazed mess last week. which meant i got home most nights and fell into bed. which means that my apartment is once again a disaster zone. buddy still has his "adorable" habit of destroying my toilet paper at every chance he gets. my dishwasher has been clean for days, but has yet to be unloaded. and the floor of my closet is once again covered in clothes and cat hair. 

basically, i took one step forward with my weekly goal, and one giant step backward with my first goal of being a bit more domestic. which means that i need to make sure that by improving one area per week doesn't take away from my what i learned the week before. apparently it seems that my tried and true method of cramming before a test and then forgetting everything afterward. i have to like "learn" or whatever.

oof. that's going to hurt.

unrelated, i did something very new york yesterday and kind of conquered a fear (well, a little bit). i walked the brooklyn bridge.

i have an extremely irrational fear of bridges. i always think that they're either going t fall out from beneath me, or that my car will careen off of the side and i have only 10 seconds to unbutton my seatbelt, open the door and dive out into the water before i die. yep, this is a completely normal thing for me. but not for most people.

walking the brooklyn bridge is apparently a new york right of passage and the fact that it took me over three years of residency to do it is blasphemy. so my friend meri g and i took to the pavement and walked both ways, and toured around the newish brooklyn bridge park. it was gorgeous and i'm glad i did it, even though i saw a girl try to climb on part of the bridge to take a picture and i had a minor panic attack.

on that note, i'll leave you with the pictures that i took. until we chat again, internet friends.

apparently, endorphins are real.

okay, this is going to sound super hokey, which is totally not my style, but i think that exercise and pampering can basically fix anything. at least, that's what i'm pretty sure i learned in the past 48 hours.

wednesday was a terrible day. like, this bad: 

i do not own this photo. just the not impressed face and bad photoshop skills.

i won't go into detail as clean fonts and dirty jokes is a positive place, but let's just say, if at 8:20am you've already thrown in the towel, it's not going to get any better from there.

what made this all worse was the fact that i had thursday packed to the motherfucking brim. (yep, motherfucker is the only adjective that is appropriate there. i said this was a positive place, not biblical one.) i had already committed to doing 7am soul cycle, was super busy with work and had my annual gala for my super-awesome non-profit that i serve on the board for, which i was pulling double duty as attendee and photographer (well, until i had too much wine and they made me put the camera down).

so, i get about 5 hours of sleep going into thursday and i still wake up in a terrible mood. and i am about to get on a bike for 45 minutes. which let's be honest, hurts your good girl. especially if you only cycle once a quarter or so, like myself. and on top of it, i was running late. this did not bode well for me.

i took a cab 8 blocks  managed to arrive on time and get in to set up my bike with two of my have gal pals, nicole and rachel. they are super happy to be there, because they do this on the regular and are true soul-cyclers (if that's what you call a brand enthusiast. should've googled that one.) me? this was my second class ever at soul-cycle, and the first one? well the first one ended with me asking to just die on the bike because it was easier than ever moving again.  

i get my bike settings going with rachel's help, because while i remembered my settings (10 7 stop!), i apparently do not have the wherewithal to set it correctly. i clip in, take a swig of water and say a short prayer. here we go.

turns out, i kind of, sort of, a little bit, a lot, fucking loved it. i'm not sure if it was because i was in the front row and had more air. it could've been that the teacher had a bit of a granola-type moment that i was shockingly into. or it could be that she played hall and oates's "rich girl" and beyonce's "love on top" back to back. regardless, i was into it. and i want to go back.

don't let that fool you into thinking that i was actually "good" at this. i still bob when everyone else weaves. i still don't think i tap it back correctly (get your mind out of the gutters, guys.) and i definitely am not ready to move past the 1lb weights. 

i left the class in a great mood, and put everything from wednesday out of my mind. didn't mean i wasn't still nervous for the day ahead, but i felt more confident that i could handle it. endorphins are NOT dolphin's tails to me anymore! they are real, viable, happy thoughts. who knew?

the other two things that made my day amaze yesterday? first was the blowout i treated myself to at lunch at drybar. i 100% recommend getting your hair did if you're in a bad mood. it's basically like they shampoo out the bad shit and condition in the juju. worth every penny (not that it's a lot mom. practically free. i'm being super responsible.)

the second was the fact that the gala was a huge success. the space was beautiful. the food was delicious. and the bar was fucking open. what could be better? oh, i know, if you are sitting at a table with a huge group of close friends. and they give you a nice camera to take pictures of each other in your fancy clothes. and i didn't even drop it once! (aren't you pleased, diana?)

i also took some pictures on my phone for the obvious reason to share on all my social media networks.

my friends taking a selfie with my phone.
much love to platt, meri and shari. hey, that rhymed!

"i just want to run and jump on you" - nicole

we managed to pull it together after the running incident.
and yes, this is nicole of soul-cycle fame noted above.
obvi, the program is doing her well.

and apparently, to share with you all online. 

even better news about yesterday? the fact that after drinking at LEAST a bottle and a half of wine last night, no hangover today.

AND I WAS ON TIME TO WORK.

miracles happen, y'all.